Silly technician, splitters are for professionals

So yesterday I called Insight (again) to explain that my broadband connection was completely out rather than just going up and down. So they "rushed" my appointment from it's scheduled 1 - 3 PM spot on Tuesday to sometime on Sunday. Sometime, of course, meaning anytime between 8 AM and 7 PM.

The guy actually showed up around 9:30 AM. It was the same guy that had set our cable up when we moved in and had run the wire from outside, set up the splitter, etc. So he fiddles around for a while, stomping up and down the stairs from the basement to the second floor, muttering about getting his exercise.

Our conversation goes more or less like this:

Him: I think it's the router.

Me: Nope, I've tried it directly from the modem to the computer and it still doesn't work.

Him: [grunt, pause for thought] I think it might be the software. See how slow it's running?

(Insight has this silly doo-dad QIC program you're supposed to install on your computer. I've only installed it on my desktop, which I use primarily as a server. I refuse to install it on my laptop.)

Me: Nope, 'cause it does the same thing on the computers without the QIC thing installed.

Him: [grunt, pause for thought] I think it's...

This goes on for a while. I'm starting to think I know more about it than he does. This is what not having competition in an area will do for you. Insight is the only cable provider around here and they are complacent. I used to think Time Warner's Road Runner down in Florida was bad, but they're looking awfully good to me now.

I've about decided that I'm just going to cancel the whole darn thing and go to DSL when he finally figures out that it's the splitter THAT HE INSTALLED causing too much signal degradation between the incoming line to the house and the second floor outlet. "Yeah," he says, "this kind of splitter drops 7dbs and this other one here, it only drops 3dbs."

My question, which I didn't ask, but was certainly thinking...why the heck did he install it in the first place then?

Anyway. It seems to be working now. After he left, I went back to sleep and didn't wake up until quite late in the afternoon. I just can't seem to stay awake any more. Then dinner (mucho importante since I hadn't had anything to eat since lunch Saturday) was tuna casserole. Some oreo pie out on the porch, and we're going to head off to bed pretty soon. Another day gone.

Tomorrow I am somehow going to stay awake for more than 3 hours at a stretch. And get my overdue allergy shots. Maybe I'll check out the coffee house and just drown myself in caffeine. I'm nearly 2/3 of the way done with the novel and I wanna churn this baby out.